The Mask

Humans live in a world with hatred and lies. We have a face, burrowed in a mask.

Life is a masquerade ball, you go around, dancing with people you don't know without revealing identities.

With the mask on, strangers can be deceived by the outside, but in the inside, unknown and tainted.

Walk out of the ball without the mask on, we have eyes, eyes that speculate and eyes that see.

People that you know will recognise you. Even with the mask on, we will call your 'bluff'.

Two Zero One Two

Well, finally, I've got to watch 2012 after a week of waiting. Wanted to watch it last Friday but it wasn't possible. Then, luckily Shu Ern ajaked all of us to celebrate Florence punya birthday, and yea, I am proud to say that I've watched it.


The GFX were not ... up to the expectations. They were a little ... cartoonish. But I enjoyed the movie as a whole for the dialogues, that emphasises on human relations. It revolves around communication between loved ones and also the trust they have for each other. I will just forget the fact that some parts just doesn't make sense, or that it defies logic.

I like the satire within the sparse of dialogues, how they cucuked the different people and lots of hidden messages that you will need to read between the lines to get it. Lots of them were not noticed, cuz I hear only minority are laughing.


It came to my mind that, I will not be noticed when the end of age comes according to my belief. Hence, for me, it is right to say that everyday is a goodbye. For I live through each day, I will give thanks that I can still see them. Talk to them and to feel them through our receptors. Every single minute is a goodbye, and every single time you meet is like a blessing. How awesome would it be if I could teach myself this lesson?

Types

Girls like to ask funny questions and request for funny things.

"Why do you love me?"

Guys don't really like like a certain part of a girl unless you're talking about body parts. So, if we answer, "your boobs", and they will that that we like them just because of the flesh and give your 'the face'.


Well, when girls consider whether to hook up with a guy, they will question and request for different things.

One type will ask, "Show me your money". This is the materialistic type. They demand for your money, they want diamond rings, they want Tag Heuer, they want Parisian wedding dress, they want a car to match every dress they have in the 3 acres wide wardrobe. It's great. This is what I call, to own.

Another will be, "Show me your heart". This one ... a little tricky. She is not asking for your heart, as in jantung in BM. She is trying to show her literacy as well as her romantic side, by using a metaphor of 'heart'. Alrite, they want guys to show how much they will die for them, how much life can the guy waste to get her. Yes, romantic type. It's good, this is what I call... words into action.


Some will ask, "show me your brains". This is the feared type, but if being analysed and studied upon, it's not as freaky as the other type. Of course, it is intimidating, they often appear as the ones who are high achievers in your school, or university or maybe your lady boss. They demand for intellectuality, thinking and also IQ + EQ. It's not too freaky because if you have the elements, there will not be any sort of problem at all. If you don't, do not attempt. I repeat, DO NOT ATTEMPT.

The final type. "Show me your rooster". No explanayshons needed. Pure sluts.


If you ask me what kind would I expect? The ideal one will be, "show me your Man U t-shirt." =)

Rain

It rains almost everyday in Kampar, looks like the rainy season is back.

Vapour, rain and water, comes in a cycle. Without rain, water will be stagnant.

Without vapour, there will not be rain.

It's a cycle, that goes on.

Raining is a process, a process that is inevitable. The deserts rain too, just less frequent.

Without rain, the soil is dry. Less nourishing, less refreshing.

A thunderstorm strikes, the land is shaken by the loud thunder, the water pours down, wets the soil, and plants rejoice. Rainbow appears after the storm.

A drizzle, that carries the dust of the air to the grounds, cleans the air, allowing a breath of air.

A rain that keeps on going. A rain that is feared.

You wait, and wait for the rain to stop, but it stays.

You see that the soil has been soaked, the drain is filled, the ground is soon to be flooded, with the rain that never stops.

It's a sign, a sign to move. To a higher ground.

Process of moving might be tough, almost made impossible through the rain.

But, the flood is rising, you have no other options, but to move on.

Rain.

To My Family

Dear Daddy, Mummy, Boy, Ying and Elma, also Pinky,

It's not easy being old and to leave everyone earlier, but I can't help it. God made my life span to be shorter than any other humans. Thanks for all the care and love that has been given to me. I really hated Pedigree or Alpo, and mum's cooking was always the best.

I'm going soon daddy, I was never angry at you when you took me back home and didn't really spend time with me. I know that you're busy. You go out in the morning and come back late at night. I will always remember that you will be sleeping while watching the TV in the midnights. I'll go sleep by your feet and you will disturb me with your legs, telling me to go away, just for the fun of it, cuz you did not kick me away. You used to bathe me and comb my long hair when you had the time, you dry me with the hairdryer, and you'll sneeze after that.

Mummy, you used to chase me with the cane when I go bang on the doors at night. I actually knew that you don't like it, just that I wanted more attention from you. I know you don't hate me. You still feed me and pat on my head with your legs when i'm sleeping on the floor. Boy once said that you hated dogs, but you didn't give me to Auntie Cha when I first came.

The one that used to play fetch and 'attack' with me, boy. I'm leaving soon. I know it's a hard decision to call for the euthanasia. It's actually better for me. I can no longer walk, my muscles are weak, I can no longer see, my motor functions are breaking down and walking in circles every time I move. I know you will cry, but don't grieve, I'm happy that I'll leave in a deep sleep. I still remember how I will bark at those who scolds you, like I barked at mummy when she scolds you. You did all you can, but I have to go, it's the life cycle. Though your belief tells you that dogs don't go to heaven, but I know that I'll go to a beautiful place.

Ying, you always complained that I drool around the house and wet your feet with my drool. You never hit me and always ask mummy not to scold me whenever I wee on the living room floor. You always bought snacks for me, my favourite milky chicken sticks, whenever you come back from Ikano. You say that I'm fat and never wanted to feed me more than 3 at each time. I really appreciate it. Really.

Elma, no words can describe your love being poured out. You came when I was quite old but you still treat me like a princess. You hug me while watching TV. You feed me with your hands and pampered me. I was too pampered that I no longer want to eat by myself. I still remember how i used to follow you around when you're new to the family, and you feel awkward why that I kept on trailing you around. I was lonely cuz boy went to college that time and in no time, you found out and started to play with me. You were the one that took care of me until now, and I know you will sit here until I go to sleep. Thanks Elma.

Pinky, I'm scared of you. Ya, when you just came. I seriously think that you're a male rather than a female dog, looking at your strength and energy. You big fat brown dog that comes and disturb me when I'm out doing my business. I know you mean no harm, I missed playing with you. You used to sit out there n look at me in the house. You once sneaked into the house to look for me when the door's opened, but you're dumb enough to forget that your legs are dirty cuz you run outside. Trust me, you cannot survive in the house, no place for your fat ass.

I'm going to sleep now, take care everyone. I will miss all of you. I hope that I will dream that I come back to this place I call home, and I hope that I will never wake up from that dream. Good night, my beloved family. =)

ia ia ias

Insomnia

Recently had trouble sleeping. I have a million things going through my mind the moment i hit the hay. Then the story goes on while I keep switching sleeping postures.

It's said that people like me that thinks or reflects the day right before sleeping are people with anxiety or suffering from midlife crisis. Am I?

To be frank, I think I had always been in the situation of insomnia, just that now ... it's worse.

Paranoia

Being afraid of shits that will happen to me is some funny weird reaction that came recently. Tend to think of some shitty consequence when I do something funny, like ... will think of the worst consequence of dying on the road.

My brain's messed up.

Seriously.

Somalia

OK. Kidding.


Coming to this point of life, I find that my life had been like a bullet train. No slow-mo shits, no time to waste, rush to a point and back again. Things you see? Lots. But all in a glance. A glance that will only be captured by a photographic memory. Too bad most of the guys in this world are pornographic memory rather than photographic. Call urself holy moly as a cow but you will have to admit this. Hence, I see nothing. Learned nothing, and been through nothing.

Time to pace down Shu. Pace down.

Came up with a song while driving through the jam in SS2 this evening.

It is called : Come on and Celibate. =)

Communications

Each has their different ways of communicating to each other.

Some people communicate effectively using SMS, some prefer telephone conversation and above all, everyone prefers face to face communications.

F2F communications may also vary in many different ways. Like, silence may also be considered as communication, and of course, it may depend on the knowledge of each other, and the use of body gestures (language).

Me and my dad has very minimal dialogues. We communicate with sparse of minimal dialogues.

eg :

D : fees out yet?

I : Ya, 1450

D : Ok

We will often end up in silence after his reply.

eg :

I : Ya, I failed my Yr2.

D : It's ok

I : really?

D : Ya, u're good in driving, can always be a bus driver.

I : .............

And above all, the most irritating sort of conversation. This happened just a few hours ago.

eg :

D : You can take the Canon G7 and use it as a 2nd camera.

I : Er, then what about you?

D : I've got myself a new LX3 with Summicron lens. *evil grin*

I : .............

That's also how i got my E71 when he bought a htc.

Well, I believe everyone has their own and personal way of communication. I don't really speak to my dad, we don't really communicate, but, ya, we communicate when we both sit down facing our own computers, busy doing our stuff. The highest form of communication, I call it, Super-Silent Communication.

Defy it.